Father's Day

In honour of Father's Day I wanted to tell you all my favourite story starring my Dad.
A few things you probably don't need to know to appreciate the story....my Dad was a huge beer drinker in his day. Two-four of black label out in the garage - that was his thing. He was also a two pack a day man from the time he was 8 years old. That's when he left school to go work on the family farm. No one needed more than a grade 3 education in the 1950s.
Well, around 1985 all that changed. My dad still drank. But, black label was gone and he turned into a "social drinker" as opposed to the constant alcoholic that he was. He also stopped smoking. He said it only took a matter of weeks to get his taste buds back. And consequently, he found he loved food. He gained 160 pounds on his 5'6" frame. We started calling him "Little Budda". I will to the day I die believe he looked more like Mickey Rooney than Mickey Rooney does.
Anyway, back to the story. In about 1992, my now husband and I were spending the weekend at my parent's house. We did what we usually did when we were there for the weekend: we had a HUGE dinner, sat around watching tv and went to bed. Well, everyone went to bed but my Dad. See, Dad fell asleep as soon as he sat down. He was like one of those dolls - as soon as you tip it backwards (say in a Lay-z- boy) it closes its eyes....
Dad would be asleep and watching something horrific like the lion chasing the zebra to eat it - and you could sneak up to him, take the channel changer from where it perched on his belly and switch stations. He would immediately wake up and say - I was watching that! - but he wasn't - he was snoring.
That particular visit, we were all asleep when the tv started to get louder and louder and louder......and my Mom started yelling from her bedroom BOB! BOB! BOB! I rushed out to see what was the matter....
"He's asleep with his finger on the volume control button AGAIN!"
According to my Mom this was a frequent occurrance. Wayne went downstairs and turned the tv volume back to normal and put the channel changer back on his belly. Mom said sometimes it was worse when he fell asleep with his finger on the channel up or down buttons and she would hear station after station after station flipping for hours on end.
Years later we discovered that my Dad had sleep apnea and he likely was quasi awake through all of these episodes. But still. Makes me laugh.