Over the last 6 months I have developed something that most women take for granted. I have never before this point in my life had PMS. Yep - that's right PMS. Never had a cramp - been retaining water - broken out - experienced irrational mood swings - nothing. I was totally truly blessed and apparently as were my family and friends.
(If I've been a bitch to you in the past and you've tried to write it off as "its just her time of the month" - dude - it wasn't - I'm just a bitch sometimes - full stop. But thanks!)
As part of what the doctor tells me is "peri-menopause" or early onset menopause I am experiencing all the joys of being a woman - its like all of my Christmases have come at once!
Lets use today as an example:
1) I have a pimple the size of a small town right between my eyebrows and it hurts. Really really hurts. You know the kind - its a pimple alright but its not something that you could satisfyingly pick at or remove. Sucks.
2) I yelled at my husband this morning because he was wearing a baseball cap that the dog chewed to go golfing in - and he couldn't find his good Jay's cap...yep - I'm going to call that an irrational mood swing.
3) I feel like someone is standing on my lower stomach and jumping up and down. I don't know that this is cramps but I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that it is. I understand now why women back in the day took to their beds for a week at a time if this is the hell that they had to endure.
4) I have no ankles and my elastic waist shorts are too tight. Not good.
I totally hate this. How do people put up with this crap? I guess I have been lucky for the last twenty something years. I'm starting to think that I might have lived a different life if I'd gone through this my whole life. I would have never gone to gym class - angered friends and made hasty hormone fuelled decisions...coulda change my whole life.
So - in my anger filled progesterone haze I will sit around and be sore and horrible and just cling to the hope that as quickly as it came it will also go. Bring on the menopause quickly and easily - I welcome your goddess HRT!
1 comment:
Do you know - in China - they have SUCH a high-intake of soy, that they do not even EXPERIENCE menopause. So much so - they don't even have a chinese WORD for menopause. It simply does not exist. Soy does help lighten the effects of menopause...and, it's not bad to stock up on some calcium, seeing as osteoperosis can come into a play when the big ME word hits. That's about all the info I can give...being a guy who somehow got out of having to deal with this horrible thing.
My thoughts are with you. Pathetic i know...but...what more can i give? Aside from...perhaps...a soy latte smoothie..?
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